my mind has a mind of its own

i'm begining to think my no man/dating idea is no bueno. i think it comes down the forbidden fruit always tastes much sweeter. it has been a challenge for me not to lust after hot guys around me, imagining doing naughty things to these poor unsuspecting gents. so basically- any decently attractive guy is fair game in my mind. i am on a 3 month hunger strike & these guys are like steak for the starving.

but the worst part is- i find myself unable to control these thoughts. and they pop up in the WORST possible times (like a jr. high boy's woody). times when i need to be focused or times when it is just grossly inappropriate.

like yesterday...i had a job interview for a pretty cool job. i was prepared, dressed up, ready with my interview questions, etc. so i walk in and realize that not only is the entire office staff have Y chromosome- but they are all smokin' hot. for the run-of-the-mill woman, this may have presented zero upset. now for a woman in my man-deprived situation, this was extremely difficult to stay on the topic of this potential job position with the yummy blonde/tan/triathlete/pink shirt-wearing interviewer when all i really wanted to say is "the REAL position i want is on top of the desk with you, hot stuff!". alas, i spoke only of marketing. however, like the naughty girl i am, i did steal some peeks at his pecs when he wasn't looking. hee hee.

i mean- how apropo is it to ask for the guy's number after an interview? i thought so. damn.

i am not a man-hater, i promise!

i was looking over my last month of posts & there seems to be a anti-man sentiment twisted in there for some reason. or maybe anit-STUPID-man. wow, i sound like an angry lesbian.

i promise, i really do love men. if i didn't- would i keep putting up with idiots in hope to find ONE who may provide me to feel the rush of interest.

to their credit, i have had some rad guys in my life. for one reason or another things just didn't work, but nonetheless i still hold fondness in my hearts for them. (y'all know who you are).

and to you guys out there: hey- i am totally ready to eat my words and state for all the world to read "THERE ARE DECENT GUYS OUT THERE TO DATE". please, someone give me that motivation.

considering that most guys are bozos, i am excluding them from my virtual hug to all the other gents out there. gotta send some love to all the decent, respectful, well mannered, honest, standup "nice guys"- YOU GUYS ROCK. please don't change because you think girls like jerks, or guys who play games, or assholes or "bad boys". smart together women appreciate dudes like you (me being one of those gals). only stupid bitches like those types of guys- and who wants a stupid bitch?!

p.s. men of the world, i still love ya!