girls & drama
as much as i state i don't understand men, i will vouche for the fact that i understand women a whole hell of a lot less. what? how can this be? just because i AM a woman doesn't mean i understand the typical representations i seem to run across in my daily life.
case in point, recently i find myself on the so-called "blacklist" with some girls who i previously considered my friends. my status went from cool chick to "let's give her the silent treatment". for some reason now, i find myself about as popular as jam pants & mullets.
the thing that irks me the most is not my exhile from the girl's group... nah, i can deal with stuff like that...it's the fact that not one had the decency to say anything to me. even when i asked specifically what the problem was. i was met with nothing, not an email not a call, nothing except the childish deletion of my "are you upset about something?" email. i honestly cannot imagine what was so horrendous that would warrent complete silence, but i guess i didn't lose that good of a friend to begin with. *sigh* moving on...
some may wonder why i had prefered to hang out with the guys in my groups vs. the girls. i think this kind of proves my point. i like things straight-forward. i just don't have time or patience to act passive-aggressive. if i am upset/pissed/hurt/mad/whatever i like to tell the person and clear the air asap. that way it reduces the drama level to almost nil. not so with most girls. they like to stew in it until they explode with seemingly psycho behavior over who knows what. or they pull the silent treatment, something i have never understood. **side note: i'm sure i'm going to get some return blogs commenting on this or some sassy comments on here. ah, that's what i get for having a blog.**
i live with one of the most dramatic women on the planet, so i have done my research. she regularly pulls the "guess why i'm mad" bullshit, and can hold a grudge so long she can't remember why she had it in the first place, and thinks it is totally logical to scream to get your point across. there really is no arguing with her, it's more like i just have to let her run her course. funny we are related, since i can't remember the last time i yelled at someone in anger, and considering i am over being mad at someone like 5 minutes later. and anyone who knows me (and who i have been pissed at) has heard it from me right away. ha ha- some of you know who you are! i really think growing up around this type of woman has made me swing the complete other way on the pendulum...if anything i am TOO easy toget along with and need to remind myself i can express displeasure without seeming "typical". don't get me wrong, she does have good qualities too, but being easy-going is not one of them.
another case in point, one of my gfs (whom i love dearly) pulled that "if you don't know i'm not going to tell you" bullshit with me last year when we were arguing. i didn't know what they problem was, yet she wouldn't explain it to me. never have i felt more like a dude in my life. i feel alot of sympathy for you guys out there! i was thinking to myself "how do i make this girl shut the fuck up?". if i didn't love that girl to pieces i would have dropped her right there and let her drama herself to sleep.
ask any of my ex bfs, they will tell you my drama quotient is on the very low end considering i still have a vagina. i admit, i do have my moments, albiet few & far between. i'm not sure if this classifies as drama, per se, but it is a "girl thing" that i find myself guilty of once in a while.
i did explain one of those weird things to a guy friend of mine. i told him that when girls say "i'm fine" they really mean "ask me more about what i'm pissed off about". if he guy didn't ask, then we think he must not really care. he then asked why i didn't just say what was bothering me in the first place & not circle around the issue. i answered with something to the fact that i think girls want to make sure the guy really wants to hear about the problem, so they make them ask again. that did not make sense to him. and i admit, it didn't quite make sense to me either. there is a lot of girl behavior i can't explain, even though i occasionally do it. ocassionally meaning like once in a blue moon. i am working or eradicating the behavior in its entirety.
hey, a girl can't be entirely perfect, can she?
case in point, recently i find myself on the so-called "blacklist" with some girls who i previously considered my friends. my status went from cool chick to "let's give her the silent treatment". for some reason now, i find myself about as popular as jam pants & mullets.
the thing that irks me the most is not my exhile from the girl's group... nah, i can deal with stuff like that...it's the fact that not one had the decency to say anything to me. even when i asked specifically what the problem was. i was met with nothing, not an email not a call, nothing except the childish deletion of my "are you upset about something?" email. i honestly cannot imagine what was so horrendous that would warrent complete silence, but i guess i didn't lose that good of a friend to begin with. *sigh* moving on...
some may wonder why i had prefered to hang out with the guys in my groups vs. the girls. i think this kind of proves my point. i like things straight-forward. i just don't have time or patience to act passive-aggressive. if i am upset/pissed/hurt/mad/whatever i like to tell the person and clear the air asap. that way it reduces the drama level to almost nil. not so with most girls. they like to stew in it until they explode with seemingly psycho behavior over who knows what. or they pull the silent treatment, something i have never understood. **side note: i'm sure i'm going to get some return blogs commenting on this or some sassy comments on here. ah, that's what i get for having a blog.**
i live with one of the most dramatic women on the planet, so i have done my research. she regularly pulls the "guess why i'm mad" bullshit, and can hold a grudge so long she can't remember why she had it in the first place, and thinks it is totally logical to scream to get your point across. there really is no arguing with her, it's more like i just have to let her run her course. funny we are related, since i can't remember the last time i yelled at someone in anger, and considering i am over being mad at someone like 5 minutes later. and anyone who knows me (and who i have been pissed at) has heard it from me right away. ha ha- some of you know who you are! i really think growing up around this type of woman has made me swing the complete other way on the pendulum...if anything i am TOO easy toget along with and need to remind myself i can express displeasure without seeming "typical". don't get me wrong, she does have good qualities too, but being easy-going is not one of them.
another case in point, one of my gfs (whom i love dearly) pulled that "if you don't know i'm not going to tell you" bullshit with me last year when we were arguing. i didn't know what they problem was, yet she wouldn't explain it to me. never have i felt more like a dude in my life. i feel alot of sympathy for you guys out there! i was thinking to myself "how do i make this girl shut the fuck up?". if i didn't love that girl to pieces i would have dropped her right there and let her drama herself to sleep.
ask any of my ex bfs, they will tell you my drama quotient is on the very low end considering i still have a vagina. i admit, i do have my moments, albiet few & far between. i'm not sure if this classifies as drama, per se, but it is a "girl thing" that i find myself guilty of once in a while.
i did explain one of those weird things to a guy friend of mine. i told him that when girls say "i'm fine" they really mean "ask me more about what i'm pissed off about". if he guy didn't ask, then we think he must not really care. he then asked why i didn't just say what was bothering me in the first place & not circle around the issue. i answered with something to the fact that i think girls want to make sure the guy really wants to hear about the problem, so they make them ask again. that did not make sense to him. and i admit, it didn't quite make sense to me either. there is a lot of girl behavior i can't explain, even though i occasionally do it. ocassionally meaning like once in a blue moon. i am working or eradicating the behavior in its entirety.
hey, a girl can't be entirely perfect, can she?
posted by issuegirl at 10:03 AM
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