this day's topic- blowjobs
as usual, i was bored today in my day job & started daydreaming. here's some misc thoughts about one of my favorite activities...
blow jobs
ahhhh, the penis is a magnificant thing. i can't think of anything hotter than giving head. i have a bad oral fixation and don't seem to own a gag reflex. yes, i've heard that some girls don' t like to suck dick. for me, it's like foreplay. give me a minute or two with your cock in my mouth & i'm ready to go, nothing else required. what guy would complain about that?!
now i am generally an "anytime, anyplace, anyhow" kinda girl when it comes to guys i'm with. i tend to be difficult to satiate. however, there are some exceptions where i have to hault the action & flat out refuse to go down.
the terms:
one, if the dick has already been in another orifice other than my mouth. sorry, i don't accept returns. it just is plain ick.
two, if the dick has already had a condom on it. for round two can we please just skip straight to the humping? i'll make it up to you. first off, the condom smells and tastes fucking gross. just because you take it off doesn't mean the barfy rubber flavor magically vanishes with it. try it, you'll agree. also, lesson learned from experience- the spermicidal ones leave a nice mouth-numbing substance on the penis & make the rest of the round not-so-fun. when i'm in bed with you i don't want to be begging for water in the back of my mind.
this one is a no-brainer. three, if the dick is attached to a sweaty body guy who just came back from a long day at work, the gym or any other activity that did not involve soap and water. the dick has an expiration date, ya know! i promise to give you the best dirtiest head of you life the second that you step out of the shower (or maybe while you're IN the shower).
other misc thoughts:
i am not a fan of the "grab my head and shove" manouver. belive me, i'll do it on my own. look ma, no hands! grabbing my head/hair during is completely acceptable, however, and excouraged. "how will i signal i want to get head?", a guy might ask. how about you point a hardon my way? i will go ahead and assume you want it 24/7. any person with a dick probably wants it sucked on at this given moment. trust me, i get it & i'm on my way to the scene right away.
asking me/telling me...i have mixed feelings on. it's almost a form of perfomance anxiety. ya, i was on my way down there already but now that you SAY to do it, i'm suddenly have a bout of stage fright. but there is something really hot about a straight forward "hey wanna suck my dick?". i guess it depends on my mood, sorry guys. i know, that gives you no clue whatsoever...but i never said i was easy.
even more disturbing behavior includes begging or whining. you have a dick- act like it! "please baby, pleeeeeeeeeaaaaaaase. just suck it for 30 seconds. whhahhhh waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh." suddenly i'm as dry as the saharah. see the above paragraphs for my thoughts on sucking a cock. i like it, i'll do it. you don't have to act like a baby to get your way.
it all comes down to location, location, location. do you like it laying down? fantastic! you like it standing up? hot! do you like it in a bed? do you like it on your head? do you like it in your car? do you like it in a bar?
on the sticky situation on cumming-when & where. when? whenever you feel like it. drag it out a bit for me, though, would you? i don't mind. where? now i'm probably going to lose a lot of the male votes here, but my mouth is not my first choice when it comes to location. sure, it's fun sometime but it's really fun when it is somewhere else. i have perfectly great Ds just sitting there, go ahead and use them. oh and there is just no excuse for not giving a girl warning so she decides the outcome (no pun intended). that's just bad form. and not nice manners if you want your visitor to call again. thank god, no douchebag has ever pulled that crap on me because if he did he'd be walking around with a half bitten off weiner.
so anyway, i just love bjs. that's all i have to say about that.
;)
blow jobs
ahhhh, the penis is a magnificant thing. i can't think of anything hotter than giving head. i have a bad oral fixation and don't seem to own a gag reflex. yes, i've heard that some girls don' t like to suck dick. for me, it's like foreplay. give me a minute or two with your cock in my mouth & i'm ready to go, nothing else required. what guy would complain about that?!
now i am generally an "anytime, anyplace, anyhow" kinda girl when it comes to guys i'm with. i tend to be difficult to satiate. however, there are some exceptions where i have to hault the action & flat out refuse to go down.
the terms:
one, if the dick has already been in another orifice other than my mouth. sorry, i don't accept returns. it just is plain ick.
two, if the dick has already had a condom on it. for round two can we please just skip straight to the humping? i'll make it up to you. first off, the condom smells and tastes fucking gross. just because you take it off doesn't mean the barfy rubber flavor magically vanishes with it. try it, you'll agree. also, lesson learned from experience- the spermicidal ones leave a nice mouth-numbing substance on the penis & make the rest of the round not-so-fun. when i'm in bed with you i don't want to be begging for water in the back of my mind.
this one is a no-brainer. three, if the dick is attached to a sweaty body guy who just came back from a long day at work, the gym or any other activity that did not involve soap and water. the dick has an expiration date, ya know! i promise to give you the best dirtiest head of you life the second that you step out of the shower (or maybe while you're IN the shower).
other misc thoughts:
i am not a fan of the "grab my head and shove" manouver. belive me, i'll do it on my own. look ma, no hands! grabbing my head/hair during is completely acceptable, however, and excouraged. "how will i signal i want to get head?", a guy might ask. how about you point a hardon my way? i will go ahead and assume you want it 24/7. any person with a dick probably wants it sucked on at this given moment. trust me, i get it & i'm on my way to the scene right away.
asking me/telling me...i have mixed feelings on. it's almost a form of perfomance anxiety. ya, i was on my way down there already but now that you SAY to do it, i'm suddenly have a bout of stage fright. but there is something really hot about a straight forward "hey wanna suck my dick?". i guess it depends on my mood, sorry guys. i know, that gives you no clue whatsoever...but i never said i was easy.
even more disturbing behavior includes begging or whining. you have a dick- act like it! "please baby, pleeeeeeeeeaaaaaaase. just suck it for 30 seconds. whhahhhh waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh." suddenly i'm as dry as the saharah. see the above paragraphs for my thoughts on sucking a cock. i like it, i'll do it. you don't have to act like a baby to get your way.
it all comes down to location, location, location. do you like it laying down? fantastic! you like it standing up? hot! do you like it in a bed? do you like it on your head? do you like it in your car? do you like it in a bar?
on the sticky situation on cumming-when & where. when? whenever you feel like it. drag it out a bit for me, though, would you? i don't mind. where? now i'm probably going to lose a lot of the male votes here, but my mouth is not my first choice when it comes to location. sure, it's fun sometime but it's really fun when it is somewhere else. i have perfectly great Ds just sitting there, go ahead and use them. oh and there is just no excuse for not giving a girl warning so she decides the outcome (no pun intended). that's just bad form. and not nice manners if you want your visitor to call again. thank god, no douchebag has ever pulled that crap on me because if he did he'd be walking around with a half bitten off weiner.
so anyway, i just love bjs. that's all i have to say about that.
;)
posted by issuegirl at 2:08 PM
1 Comments:
silly stitch!
you are not much of a man if this blog only makes you want a sandwich. yawn!!!
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